[00:00:00] Welcome to episode 145 of the Bandhive Podcast. It is time for the episode of the Bandhive Podcast. My name is James Cross and I help independent artists tour smart this week on the show. I'm gonna be talking about why you should just ask. I know it can be terrifying to ask somebody who seems more important or more connected than you to do you a favor or help you out with a show or help you book a tour, whatever it is.

But as an artist, you run a business. That means that you need to be ready to ask for opportunities when you're dealing with people that can help you with those opportunities. Now, as humans we're naturally designed to avoid rejection, and you might not want to ask for an opening slot on a show because it's a slim chance, which means there's a high likelihood of rejection.

all that means is that somebody else who has learned how to control their own fears will ask, and they will get that slot. If there's no opening. There are tons of situations where this could apply [00:01:00] the music business as a whole, essentially relies on people who ask for favors or opportunities.

The other side is people who offer gigs to their friends and acquaintances. It is really who, you know, more than what you know. So for example, I'm not gonna name names here. I've toured in the past, but I've never toured as a front of house engineer. I've also done front of housework at venues, and I have been the production manager front of house engineer for bands, just not on tour.

I've done other stuff on tour. Well, guess what a friend of mine reached out a few weeks ago and offered me a friend of house tour because he knows me. He knows I can run sound and he knows I've toured. I've never toured his front of house before, but he's still offering it to me because he Knows me and trusts me. this is a friend who we became friends because he followed me on Instagram and said, Hey, can I come on your podcast? So now, you know, it's somebody who's been on the podcast, but that's still, we've had quite a few guests point being he reached out and asked and I said, yeah, let's do it.

And now we've been friends for quite some time. [00:02:00] So. If he hadn't asked, then we wouldn't have known each other. He wouldn't have had a potential front of house engineer for this tour. Now I turned this down, cuz I'm not prepared to go on the road for eight weeks. Right now that all aside, that opportunity came one because he asked and two, because I said, yes, let's do an episode.

So in a similar situation, the tours that I've been on, most of the tours I've done were just offered to me outta the blue, but there have been times where I reached out and said, Hey, I wanna do this tour. One of the ones I did on merch, I actually reached out, there was a post in a Facebook group.

Somebody was looking for merch. And I thought, you know, there's probably somebody more experienced cuz this was early on in my career, but you know, I'll do it, I'll do it. And I reached out and I got the. Now it turns out that they were looking for somebody new. If I had had that fear of, oh, I don't wanna get rejected, they're gonna say no, this isn't good enough.

Then I wouldn't have applied. And somebody else would've gotten the gig. So growing your network, getting opportunities, all that kind of stuff, there's [00:03:00] always a chance of rejection. The key to getting over any fear of rejection you might have is to experience rejection over and over and over again, which means you need to reach out to people who you want to know and actually talk to them.

start small and work your way up to bigger names. This could be just, you know, the local promoter who you've heard a lot of things about from other artists, but you don't know them person. Reach out say, Hey, you know what, I'd love to meet up. I'm gonna be at this show that you're promoting, can I introduce myself something like that or even better?

Just go to the show. Find that promoter and introduce yourself, say, Hey, you know, my name is such and such. Just wanted to say, I really love the shows you're doing. This is really cool to see this scene in our town, getting built up. You know, if you're ever looking for more bands, let me know. If you feel like asking right away about booking shows, maybe you just wanna introduce yourself in later, you can drop in that.

You also play music. That's really up to you and you need to gauge how that conversation is going. But either [00:04:00] way. You're reaching out and you are facing a chance of rejection. They might say, Hey, I don't have time to talk to you. I'm really sorry. Bye. They might not even apologize.

Who knows? They might just ignore you The key here is that you want to go out there and talk to people and build up your resistance to rejection. You know what, if somebody doesn't wanna talk to you, no big deal. How many people are in the music business.

Yeah. The music business is small, but it's not tiny. Now look at it this way. Even if a show or a festival that you wanna play is already booked solid. You could still reach out and ask. one, because again, it helps you build up that resistance to rejection. And two, you never know what could happen.

Maybe they'll put you on a backup list in case another artist drops off, or maybe they have another festival later in the year that they wanna put you on. And they'll say, Hey, you know, not for this one, but what about this other one? That's coming up in three months.

Do you wanna play that? That's great. If you can line things up like that, that is perfect. they might even say, Hey, we have some other [00:05:00] smaller shows that we can put you on. You know, you wanna play in two weeks. Sure. There you go. Now, one of the other things here to keep in mind is you don't wanna focus on rejection instead focus on the

potential future opportunities. So even if a person doesn't give you anything. Mention, Hey, I'm gonna be at the festival anyway. And if you're gonna be around and you're not super busy, I'd love to meet you just to introduce myself. It's that easy. And most people will say, oh yeah, if I'm not busy, come see me at this spot. Just getting that FaceTime and making a good first impression in person.

Can absolutely help solidify you in their mind. So it might be tempting to only reach out to people online, but meeting people in person is really important. And especially if you can show like, Hey, I know we didn't get the show, but I just wanted to introduce myself and say, Hey, people respect that.

on the other hand, if you run away with your tail between your legs, they're probably not gonna wanna work with you in the future.

So again, this can apply [00:06:00] to any aspect of the music industry. It's not just limited to touring or booking shows or networking, anything like that. It could. Literally anything, meeting new people, asking someone to listen to your music, whatever it is, you need to be comfortable making the ask. You need to be comfortable talking to people, reaching out to people, asking them for favors because ultimately, you know, putting an unknown local band on a festival probably is a favor.

At least to some extent, maybe you'll bring 10 people, 20 people, 30 people who knows, but if you don't already have an established draw in the market for that festival or show, they're not gonna know how many people you could bring.

So they're basically taking all the risk and doing you a favor by saying, yeah, we'll take on that risk to let you play, even though maybe you won't bring anyone now one more thing that will help a ton when you're reaching out to people is being concise and respecting the other person's time.

So if you're sending an email, don't write an essay to someone you don't know.[00:07:00] Don't talk their ear off in person instead, keep it short and sweet. And if they want to engage further, they will. And be sure you're giving them opportunities to engage further. So if you're telling them about yourself, Pause, give a little opening for them to jump in and ask a question or relate to you in some way by sharing their own story.

An example of this is if you're talking to a potential new fan, keep your conversation with them to a minute or two, unless they are actively participating in the conversation too. And they are chatting with you.

They are asking questions, you know, it shouldn't be all about you telling them about your band. It should be a two-way street where you're both talking and you're essentially sparking a friendship. It's not a sales pitch. You're not talking the whole time, selling them on your band. You're instead forming a connection with them.

same goes, if they look like they're in a rush to go somewhere, let them do that and mention in a friendly way that you'll be in touch soon, you'll be reaching out. if they gave you their contact information, sign up [00:08:00] for the mailing list, whatever it is.

Now, overall, the more you put yourself out there, the easier it will become to go and do that again at larger levels, you can replace your fear of rejection by forming habit and learning that most people will be down to chat or do what they can to help just on a personal closing note, I've experienced this so much in my own career.

Even back when I was just getting started, I reached out over and over and over again to some people trying to line up interviews with the bands that I wanted to interview. And even though sometimes it didn't work. Other times it did. And those people remembered me. There were bands that I didn't get to interview them until the third or fourth try, but those people still did their best to make it happen when they were able to and through all of that, it really was a good exercise for me to not be afraid to reach out to people.

This was me a 16 year old kid reaching out to [00:09:00] Interscope records and getting an interview through Interscope records with AFI. I was 16 now, granted they didn't know that all they knew is I was working for a college radio station. So I had that advantage, but nonetheless, I was 16.

If a 16 year old can reach out to a major label and form a relationship with the people working there that is solid enough for them to say, yeah, we'll let you interview one of our acts. Then I think you can reach out to any local promoter, whether it's for a show or a festival or any other situation, really, and make the ask, just introduce yourself, start that conversation and see how you can mutually help each.

Because getting over that fear of rejection is the first step to forming new relationships in the music business.

That does it for this episode of the Bandhive Podcast. Thank you so much for tuning in and listening. I really appreciate it. And I hope that this episode has inspired you to go out there and form new relationships. Because again, [00:10:00] the music business is all about relationships.

It's not what you know, it's who, you know, so the more that you can go out there and meet people and really maintain relationships with them. The better off you will be to this day. I still see people looking for help on tour or bands to play shows. And I'm always recommending friends for gigs like this.

So the more people, you know, in the business, the easier it becomes for you. And the only way you're gonna meet more people is by reaching out to them because a lot of these people are super busy and they won't reach out to you proactively. But if you reach out. Because they're music fans, most people in the music business are, they probably will be willing to talk

Now, speaking of networking, we have a free Facebook community for listeners of the Bandhive Podcast, where you can ask questions, Share your thoughts about current events in the music business, talk to other artists and grow your relationships Or even ask for help on what you're doing. Say, Hey, we need a graphic designer. [00:11:00] We need a studio engineer, where do we go? Who do we hire All those conversations can be found in the Bandhive Facebook group. So you should join us.

Now, if you're not already there, you can search for Bandhive. That's B a N D H I V E on Facebook. Make sure to find the group and you can like the page if you'd like to while you're there. But the main thing is find the group, or you can go to Bandhive.rocks/group to automatically be redirected to our Facebook community.

Again, you can search for Bandhive on Facebook or go to Bandhive.rocks/group/group. Thanks again for listening. We'll be back with another brand new episode next Tuesday at 6:00 AM. Eastern time right here in your favorite podcast app until then I hope you have a great week stay safe. And of course, as always keep rocking.